My Husband Hates Me – What Should I Do?

Last Updated on January 19, 2024 by Lori Pace

Feeling like “My husband hates me” is a difficult place to be.

You may feel like your husband is not caring about you anymore after many years of marriage. There are possibly signs that your husband is hating you. These are signs that there are problems in the marriage. You can let go of hatred and resentment within a marriage.

What Leads To Resentment And Hatred Within Marriage?


People are more inclined to put in effort during the early stages of a relationship and possibly even before marriage. This is about going the extra mile to show affection and make your partner happy. Neglecting a relationship can become more common over the course of a marriage and can make you feel like your husband hates you.

You might have neglected to pay attention to affection or sex or maybe he feels disconnected and uncommunicative.

Selfish Behavior

You might be wondering “Why is my husband so mean?” It could be because of selfishness on your part. Healthy marriages must be reciprocal. This means that both spouses must contribute to the household as well as the work involved in running a family. Your husband may feel that you do all the work, but you get very little in return.

Selfish Behavior
Being selfish can create resentment in a relationship.

Look at the way you share responsibilities within your relationship. Are you a husband who works long hours and does all the housework? Do you feel he is carrying more responsibility than you?

Maybe he is trying to make your life easier, but you’re not happy with his efforts. You might feel that every decision is made based on your desires and needs, and that you are unwilling to compromise. These signs would indicate selfish behavior that is destroying the relationship and making me feel like my husband hates you.



Although it seems obvious, cheating can lead to resentment in a marriage. You may feel that your husband isn’t interested in me because of an affair. Cheating can cause your husband to lose trust in you and even cause shock. Resentment can be caused by infidelity that is not only sexual.

Even an intimate affair with another man, via texting or the Internet, can cause marital discord. One study found that almost 60% of respondents were aware of cases where couples had split up after emotional infidelity via social media.

Abusive Behaviors

When we think about abuse, we often picture physical abuse in which one person hits another. However, abuse does not have to be physical to cause resentment in a relationship.

Emotional abuses such as constant criticism and name-calling can lead to resentment and even violence. You may feel like your husband is hating you if you tell him negative things about yourself all the time.

Other Reasons

You may also think that your husband is not interested in you for other reasons. Maybe he’s stressed out at work and is taking it out on himself. Maybe you’ve been nagging your husband, or giving him little or no input in the decisions made around the home, and you don’t even know it.

Reasons Might Lead To “My Husband Hates Me”

Knowing what factors can lead to hate and resentment within a relationship, you might be wondering “Why does my husband not love me?” The following could be the reason:

Reasons Might Lead To "My Husband Hates Me"
Sometimes, enough is enough.
  1. He believes that you don’t want to compromise.
  2. You come across as selfish.
  3. You feel some kind of neglect in your husband, be it lack of attention, intimacy, or sex.
  4. He feels that you are being too harsh and critical of him.
  5. An affair has caused him to feel resentful.
  6. A relationship you have made with another man online can cause him pain.
  7. You keep nagging him.
  8. He’s taking your stress away.

If you have a negative relationship and lack positive interactions, it can lead to hatred and resentment . The negative interactions will only build up. Negativity can lead to constant criticisms and name-calling. This can make you feel resentful towards your husband.

10 Signs Of “My Husband Hates Me”

The two of you are constantly fighting

Each couple has to experience conflict. However, if you find yourself fighting all the time, it is an indication that hate and resentment exist in your relationship. Sometimes you may be fighting about trivial issues because you cannot have positive interactions with hatred.

My Husband Hates Me Because I Feel No Effort From My Husband

You may feel that your husband doesn’t try to make you happy or make your marriage work. You may feel like you are just roommates, and not spouses. If your husband is a victim to neglect, this could be the case. You may think that your husband is neglecting his needs for affection and attention. He might stop putting in effort.

There is no physical intimacy in your relationship

no physical intimacy in your relationship
Everything is only a memory.

In most marriages, sex is an integral part. If you’re not having sex, it is a sign that your husband doesn’t like you. However, there is more to intimacy than just sex. This could also indicate hatred if your husband doesn’t hug, kiss, or touch you to show affection. People generally don’t show any physical intimacy to people they don’t like.

Your husband has cheated on you

Infidelity can lead to resentment from your husband. If your husband hates your wife, he might also be unfaithful towards you. This is one of the biggest signs that your husband doesn’t like you.

A happy, loving relationship is one that doesn’t involve cheating. People who are happy with their relationships have negative attitudes towards infidelity. Infidelity is more likely if your husband is hostile to you and unhappy in the relationship.

My Husband Hates Me And I Feel Unappreciated 

Perhaps you’ve been trying to make your husband happy by doing little things like picking up his favorite snack from the grocery store or helping with an extra chore around home. You may feel that your husband is taking you for granted if you put in the effort.

He avoids spending time with you

You can tell if your husband is mad at you by how much time you spend together. This could indicate that he feels like he is always away or has an excuse not to spend quality time with you. If he isn’t spending time with your family, it means that he doesn’t enjoy the experience.

Your husband is forgetting important dates

It is common for us to forget birthdays and anniversaries. However, if your partner suddenly stops acknowledging your birthday or doesn’t remember important dates, it could indicate that there may be a deeper issue. It is an act of hatred to forget these dates, especially if the person does not feel any remorse.

There is violent or abusive behavior in the relationship

 violent or abusive behavior in the relationship

It is important to be clear that violence and abuse are not acceptable in a relationship. However, if your husband hates you, you may display these behaviors. This could include physical violence or emotional abuse . For example, frequent name-calling, verbal insults or frequent put-downs. These behaviors are not compatible with love and can be a sign that a couple is harboring hatred.

He Does Not Miss Me When Apart Meaning My Husband Hates Me?

You might be asking, “Does my husband love me?” Consider how he responds to you returning after you have been gone. Two people who are in a loving relationship will miss their partner when they are apart.

If your husband doesn’t seem to care about you, it could be a sign that there is hatred in the relationship. You may notice apathy in your husband’s face when you return from work, or he might be annoyed when you enter the house.

Your husband really isn’t very involved in your life anymore

If your husband is hostile to you, it’s likely that you will notice that you lead separate lives. He may not be involved in your life as much. He won’t go out with you and will not be interested in your day or what you did when you aren’t there.

What To Do If You Have The Feeling Of “My Husband Hates Me”?

If you can’t shake the feeling of, “My husband hates me,” the first step is to sit down and have a talk. It is frustrating if someone hates you for no reason, but if your husband shows signs of resentment, there may be an underlying problem that he feels he hasn’t been able to discuss with you.

Have an honest conversation with him

Talk to him and listen to his side of the story. Perhaps he doesn’t get the support he needs from you, or maybe he feels like you constantly criticize him. An honest conversation may help you see the root causes of resentment within your marriage.

Make some positive changes in your behavior

It is important to examine your behavior and make positive changes. Are you withholding affection, nagging or shaming your husband? Be more positive towards him by giving praise and showing appreciation .

Be conscious of showing love by touching your body. Sometimes this can be enough to remove negativity and hatred from your air. If you feel that your husband is hating you, the first thing to do is sit down and have some conversation.

It can be frustrating when someone doesn’t like you. However, if your husband is displaying signs of resentment it could indicate that there is an underlying issue that he isn’t willing to talk about with you.

Lori Pace
Lori Pace

Lori Pace is a single mother of three daughters ages 7 and under. As a working mom from home, she balances kids, work and two crazy dogs with humor and love. Follow Lori as she honestly gives tips and advice based on her own experiences as a single mom!