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Things To Consider When Raising A Kid Without A Dad Around

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Raising a child without a dad around is a tough job for any woman. A single mom has to deal with being the breadwinner, role model, provider and emotional comforter all at once. Any single mother out there will tell you how difficult this task is – although some end up scaling through, giving their child everything he or she needs, the void remains and it is a void that can be difficult to fill even when the luxuries of life are present.

There are a couple of things you can do to ensure your child grows into a confident young man when his father is not around.

  1. Role Models

When the biological father is not around, the next best thing will be to find a father figure the boy can look up to. This is quite important for kids. Having both sexes around a child as he or she grows is important for well he will grow. A boy needs lots of role models but ultimately,

his number one model will still his mom. Your attitude and mood can also affect your child as he grows up, so you have to watch how you behave around your child. you will have to suck up your emotions and frustrations and learn to put up a positive front at all times. The last thing you want is to make your child start wishing his daddy was around. To maintain a balanced front, take time out on a regular basis to visit the spa or for yoga meditation so you can keep that positive outlook.

  1. Set Limits

Don’t spoil your son because you feel the need to compensate due to the absence of his dad. Every child needs structure and limits to know what to do and not do. Teach your kid the rules of the house and let them know the expectations you have. Discipline and other consequences for bad behavior should be consistent for teaching them how to behave and respect others.Children can be raised poorly too if they have both parents around. It’s not about the presence or absence of either one of the parents but more about how the child is treated in the home – this will determine whether the child will succeed or fail in future.

  1. Family Time

Spend time to be with your son. Take him out, invite his friends. Do stuff together. Most kids are not picky about what you do with them as long as you take time out to be with them Remember you don’t need to have a father to enjoy a go-kart race with your friends. Prioritize your son’s time and make sure you sit and talk with him often. He will probably be glad to see you pitch with him often more than you know. He might be faster than you but that’s expected from boys. Spend time and have fun with your son. The little moments mean a lot to kids and they will be fun for your as well.

  1. Show Love

As you spend more time cleaning your son’s room, helping him with his assignments or picking up his toys from the living room, it is normal to forget to tell him how much he means to you and how much you love him.

You could feel exhausted from time to time and that’s ok but you should always try to show unconditional love to your child even when he makes mistakes. Young boys need praise a lot. it’s a confidence booster and it goes a lot deeper than you can imagine. If you’re raising him on your own, try to see things from his own perspective and support him always so he feels a sense of security around you.

Challenges Faced for Single Mothers

With all of these points, there are still challenges that single parents face from time to time.

Raising a child is quite difficult and without a father around to support, it becomes even more difficult. Being a single mom adds its own pressure and fatigue to your lifestyle as the stakes are higher. If you’re too tired to be supportive emotionally and physically for your child, certain emotions may arise which will lead to behavioral changes.

Another challenge that you might face will be on income. As most single-parent families generally tend to have lower incomes and a reduced access to health care. Juggling work and childcare could be difficult and financially straining.

What you can do to reduce the stress in your family is to show love to your child and give him support. Set aside time each day to play, read or sing with your child. Create a routine and never break away from it. if you work at a full-time job and need regular child care, you can hire a babysitter who will continue to provide for your child while you’re away at work trying to make ends meet. If you have older kids, don’t rely on them to watch their junior as this is a recipe for disaster. Hire a professional caregiver and set the limits. Let them know the house rules and expectations that you desire from them. You also have to speak to your child about showing respect to the caregiver and discipline. You can also reduce your child’s screen time when they grow up and show certain traits of accepting more responsibility.

 

Tips When Planning Out the Best Single Mom Winter Getaways

 Being a single parent is probably one of the hardest responsibilities that you may encounter as an adult. In almost all aspects, there needs to be changes, adjustments and even obstacles. This remains the same whenever you would plan for a travel or vacation for you and your kids. While you ultimately like for your kids to have fun and enjoy the whole trip, you should not forget that you also need to satisfy yourself and be relaxed. Since traveling is now among the most growing industries, different vacation options are available and you can fairly well choose one that would suit your needs and preferences.

For special occasions

Holidays and special occasions are always a good reason for you and your little family to go out of town or even out of the country. Long weekends usually happen and that would be a great opportunity to bond and take some time off away from work, stress and worries. The winter season is one of the most popular times of the year when people would take a vacation and go elsewhere. Just so you know, it is not at all impossible for you to plan the best single mom winter getaways as long as you keep these tips and things in mind.

Choosing a destination

The most important question to ask yourself is – where will you be going? Since winter is just about starting, you might want to consider picking a place that has warmer climate. This way, you know that you and your kids will enjoy doing outdoor activities, knowing that you will not be worried about the weather being too cold or freezing.
If you live in the US and you do not want to travel out of the country, there are still a lot of places that you can opt for when it comes to winter getaways. Honolulu in Hawaii, for example, is an all-time favorite whether it is winter or not. You can easily find resorts and hotels in the area that can cater to specific needs and requirements. Even when you are a single mom with kids, you do not have to worry about finding a place to stay that is comfortable and enjoyable at the same time. Another popular place to visit would be the state of Arizona where you and your children can spend the day shopping or just lounging around various attractions and amenities. However, remember that Phoenix is not at all very famous for nightlife sceneries, which means that it is ideal for best single mom winter getaways that only involve daytime fun and sleeping early at night. Other locations to consider would be Las Vegas, Miami, Denver, Los Angeles, San Francisco and Nashville or Memphis Tennessee.

Involving the kids with the planning

If your kids are no longer toddlers, it might be better to ask them first and know if they have any ideas or suggestions in mind. They will surely appreciate it if you can discuss with them some details such as your options, hotel accommodations and even the activities that you are planning for the family. This makes them feel involved and important, so they won’t be left out and feel indifferent about the whole idea.

Things to do and places to visit

Once you have already reached your destination, the fun then begins. It is best to find or think of activities that you can do together as a family, regardless of age or gender. As the mother, you surely already know what will interest your kids and how they will be able to enjoy the trip. You can wander around the city or the area where you are staying, perhaps go and check out local stores or gift shops. It is also a good idea to try different restaurants and delicacies. If your kids want to, you can find a local park or a playground where they can roam freely and play. If the kids are interested, might also want to plan museum visits or learn more about the local architecture and geography of the place. Not only will you have some time to bond but at the same time, the kids will surely learn a lot from it.

Other things to remember

If in case you are traveling outside of the country, remember to always be prepared and alert when it comes to safety and security. Be sure to never let your kids be out of your sight especially if it’s a place that they have never visited before. You must also not forget that you will need to secure proper documentation before you can bring your kids abroad. Child protection laws require a single parent to still have the permission from the other parent when going out of the country. For divorced single moms, a notarized letter from your ex should be helpful enough for you to easily pass borders. In case your spouse is already dead, a copy of the death certificate should suffice.

Surviving Single Motherhood: Surefire Tips for Struggling Moms

Parenting is hard already; let alone if being a single mom. In this situation, it’s easy to think that nothing’s going right and you are in this battle alone. But do not lose hope – there are lots of women going through the same phase as yours right now.

We have talked to bunches of single moms out there. Just so you know, they have survived the chaos. How they did so is compiled on our list below.

Focus on the positive side.

While there are downsides, there is also a bright side to being single parent. One is you don’t have to argue with another parent about decision making. Therefore, you can be more focused on your relationship with your child. Another thing is that you’ll become a stronger person that your child will idolize as they grow older. You might not notice but they appreciate that you look out for their interests and you’re focused on them 24/7.

Take things one step at a time.

If you haven’t delivered yet, focus on your upcoming delivery, caring for the baby, looking for a new job, and a reliable daycare. Fears might overcome your thoughts, but don’t forget about your friends and family

Ask for help when you need to.

Think about the positive people in your life – your best friend, a relative, or your mom. Anyone who can influence your child in a good way. You might be an awesome mom, but you can’t be all things to your child. It’s virtually impossible to do all things by yourself. While they have lost one parent, talking to other people might be a great help. So make sure to take your child to them once in a while – you’ll see it’s worth a try.

Cry yourself out.

Sometimes, crying is all you need to lighten the load on your shoulders. So don’t be shy and cry it all out. There’s no reason to hold in your feelings and stress inside. Once you feel better, put yourself together and say, “I am ready to be a supermom”. Then, move on.

Schedule your “me time”.

All the hassles of being a single mom does not mean you shouldn’t give yourself some time alone. A time when you don’t have to worry over someone or look after them. Great ideas you can try are whole body massage once a week, manicure/pedicure at the salon, or even simple morning jog at the park. These activities will efficiently rejuvenate you emotionally and physically. Skip the guilt when hiring or asking someone to look after the kids – it’s alright to do the things you love once in a while. However, if you can’t really get out, have your kids play together so you can enjoy your favorite cup of coffee while reading a magazine or doing other things that fascinate you – this sure will make you a better mom.

Steer clear of the negativity.

You are all by yourself and there are tons of things to do. However, you should not let the pressure get into you – there is no perfect parent in the world. Even single moms make mistakes. So, spend more time with your child than on house chores or work. Kids are happier when you bond with them more often so forget dish washing or laundry once in a while – if it means more happy time with baby. No one’s going to judge you for leaving the sink or house dirty, anyway.

Getting a new job.

Some single moms get support from the baby’s father. However, if you are experiencing the other way around, don’t fret because there are ways that you can support your child with your own sweat. Use your skills whenever you feel that you’re ready to work again. If you don’t feel skilled enough, consider taking a crash course like computer training or baking. If you can’t leave home because you don’t have a babysitter, the online platform is your friend. Nowadays, there are thousands of online gigs that let you earn by doing computer-related tasks. Based from personal experiences, many moms have had great success in supporting their kids while working at home.

Raise your chin up.

Birth minus the wedlock and divorce are major cause of worry for women with unsuccessful relationships. Prepare yourself for questions and uncomfortable scenarios. Like we’ve mentioned above, it doesn’t help to dwell on the negative side so surround yourself with people that generously lift your spirit and boost your confidence. You can also keep your head high from judgmental people by seeking support from the neighborhood or groups for single moms like you. Socialize with others over a music class or even at the library. Searching the internet for moms going through the same dilemma might be a good outlet as well.

Single Mothers

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 In the United States, there are million of single mothers now who are facing difficulties for their daily living. They usually work for an extended hours, have financial problems or issues and did not finish school. However, there are numbers of federal and state programs that are planned to produce and meet their materials and financial assistance. By conducting investigations and surveys for the said programs, single mothers tasks will now become lighter and easier to manage.

Single mothers also have their dreams that they want to pursue and they are making it close to reality with grants. There are some that have been able to commit higher education to prepare themselves for exceptional job opportunities. While others are starting with their own business or improve and develop it more to those who already have it. Mothers will always prioritize the security of their children by providing them a roof over their heads, supplying them with quality health care, feeding them with nutritious foods and bringing them to school for education. Grants have become a big help for single mothers, backing them up doing the things and other stuff that they could do for their children, but just financially inadequate.

Financial Assistance

  • Grants

It is a kind of fund or system for assisting those who are qualified to apply in the organization, foundation, corporation, trust, or any other educational institution. It is a kind of assistance or an amount of money that is being awarded to you according to the specifications of the grant guidelines. Meaning, there is no single cent interest attached to it and you are not tied to any obligations of paying it back. Plus the tax exemption for your bonus.

           

How to Avail it?

Grants are not easy to avail. It is the most hard application in the government because the availability of it is not as open or many as some loans and scholarship application. So in order to be granted with your application on it, you must do some more research online, submit applications, keep updating and daily follow- up.

 

Make some background check to make sure you are eligible for applying for grants. If you do not meet one of their qualifications or mandatory requirements, then you are not a qualified applicant. You should abide their rules to deserve the money reward or grants. There are different types of grants offered to single mothers US citizen.

Types of Grants:

  1. Government Grants
    2. College Grants
    3. Financial Aid
    4. Housing Grants
    5. Business Grants
    6. Small Business Grants
    7. Minority Grants
    8. Personal Grants
    9. Daycare Grants
  • Housing Assistance

This is applicable and available to assist you with the cost across the country, an assistance from the organizations and government. You may just provide the demand requirements and check the eligibility of your applications. Then you may submit it to their office. There are also different types of housing assistance from the US government as follows:

It is a short- term accommodation for homeless people or those who are in crisis. Applicable to those in a domestic violence situation, fire victims and any other natural disasters where their houses are being destroyed. With this program, you can claim and get the basic necessities of the affected individual, like a place where you can sleep, take showers, do your laundries, get clothing and be fed or get money for your food. All costs will be shouldered by the social services and organizations.

This can be availed with the Section 8 vouchers or can be part of a community where the houses and apartment units are offered at a lower price. Expecting a low cost rental or low monthly mortgage payments for this program.

This program caters especially for those who have low incomes only. The monthly income of the applicant of this program will be checked if they meet the maximum amount of the qualification required before they can avail and live in the house, apartment units or townhouse with this application.

With this program, they help people with their monthly rental of their units where they live. They are going to check if the applicant is eligible when claiming another payment or move. You should prepare your documents because they will surely ask for it. The organization or the government will assist you with money to provide for the rental, or you can also work with the landlord so they will reduce the rent of your unit.

·        Emergency Solutions Grants (ESG) Program

It supports grants by the rules to metropolitan cities, states, urban counties and all US territories supporting emergency shelter, homeless prevention, emergency shelter and many other related services. The intention of this program is to help the families and every individual to immediately recover their stability in constant housing after has been suffering from homelessness and the housing crisis.

  • Scholarship

For single mothers, pursuing higher education seems difficult to survive. Aside from thinking about all the expenses you will need for your college, the duty or responsibility as a mother shall always be done at the same time to assure that children are still well taken care of while you’re in the class.

But the government will also take care and help you with all your needs in school. That sounds to be the good news for you because with this program, the chance is there to fund your education and not only that or for you alone because your children are also worthy of this scholarship program from the government. You may select the different types of college scholarship below to choose the best course for you to apply for.

Types of Scholarships

It supports you with a certain amount of money for the applicant to ensure their school miscellaneous, tuition fees, books and any other related college accounts. The money being used for your school doesn’t have to be paid back, but there are some requirements, rules and regulations that you have to follow and fulfill in order to keep the scholarship assistance with you and continue it until the last day of your school.

Those single mothers who are lined up in nursing career are eligible with this Nursing Scholarship program. They were supported by the government by paying their expenses for tuition, books, and also their living cost. The amount of money given to them doesn’t have to be paid back, but there are some associations want you to work with their designated health care centers and areas during or after your higher education.

This program helps those children whose parents are financially insufficient with their college cost. Parents need to submit the information of the children so their application will be granted. Moreover, there are still requirements and conditions that the children need to comply and fulfill even after they received the support money.

  • Loans

It is a useful financial assistance that can help you in many ways, depending to whatever purpose or reason for taking out a loan. So, it’s simply just humors saying that applying for a loan is a dreadful idea. It really matters to you on how to choose the type of loans you want to secure, how are you going to use it and being committed of paying it back according to its terms and conditions as both parties agreed.

Single Mother is a Super Hero

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Reasons Behind Single Mothers

A Choice

Don’t feel sorry for me, I am not a single mother by chance, but a single mother by choice. An empowering quote for women as proving that women do not need men and that they can able to support and raise their children without any help from men. Yes, it is not an easy choice but because they chose it so they have to stand by it and held responsible for it.

Some women have an intense desire of a single parenting without any complications that a husband could bring. Some of the mothers do not believe that they need a husband or partner to help raise a child.

Death of a Partner

Historically, it is one of the common cause of single mothers. No one is exempted and can’t avoid for this might happen to anyone. Development and good maintenance in maternal care and sanitation have lessened the death for those of reproductive age , making death a less common cause for single mother.

Divorce

At around the mid- 90’s, there was a significant amount of single mothers raising children with over 7 million single mothers in the United States alone. The chances of having divorce are increasing in the following years.  Researched shows that about 69% of children in American living in a household that was a different form than the usual central family.

Unintended Pregnancy

In the United States, the numbers of unintended pregnancy are increasing among unmarried couples than the married ones. A man may leave the woman as he may want to avoid or get out from a responsibility of bringing up the child.

We all fail, but it is the women who mostly ended up like losing the game. But that is just the first impression that most people see in a relationship without knowing the real fact. If a woman left behind by his partner on her pregnancy until giving birth to the child, doesn’t mean it’s a failure, but instead it’s a gift or reward for you in the end.

 

 

 

In Reality: Being A Single Mother Sometimes Suck!

When you are a single parent, it is only you alone at all times.  In reality, sometimes being a single parent really sucks.  You have to be always on duty and you can’t have days off nor breaks. It has to be you and only you alone in 24/7 doing all the duties of a mother. But if you can call somebody else like your sister or mother to watch for child if you have something urgent or important to take care of, then you are lucky.

A single mother’s job is really a hard work and it is really even harder without the joint custody’s privilege.  We only pray and hope that there will be someone to help us, who can be our right hand, and someone who can really share in the responsibilities of a parent. We badly need help and sometimes we want to shout out for a break. Single mothers face, carry, provide and solve out everything like household chores, all the basic needs, bills, health care, and education.

Single Mother’s Tips and Tricks

Anyone can face of the toughest responsibilities of parenthood, that is for sure. It is indeed totally pleasing and beneficial, but we also can’t deny the fact that it is never easy, imagining how hard it can actually get for a single mother alone. Solo parenting is even more challenging, chaotic and most especially it is stressful for single mothers. Nevertheless, you have no other choice once you are in this particular situation, but to be courageous, strong and accept happily the responsibility and just enjoy being a mother.

Whether you are a widow, divorced or a single mother, there are always ways to make your path or journey an enjoyable and a successful one.

 

  • Connecting with your child

Aside from taking care all the responsibilities for your child, a single mother also needs to handle a lot of tasks and decisions all by themselves. Being the head of the household is one of the important roles that you have to maintain and develop every day. In terms of your child’s behavior, either good or bad, you are obliged to answer for it once be called. No parents want to get affected by something that needs to be settled, especially when it’s all about your kids how to be in the future. Do as many ways as you can and as early as possible to connect with your child in all aspects. Having a strong family bonding and routine is a great help, you can all stick to it. Setting a curfew time each night and giving them household chores are the best ways to train them that they can also benefit in the future.

Always give time to help your child with their homework because with that way, you can have the chance to know him more and better. You can also build trust with your child, making them feel that you are also their best friend, openness is a strong foundation of your relationship especially when they are getting younger. Spending quality time with them is so much better, a great to time catching up with each other.

2.) Quit feeling guilty

Time will really come for you to feel guilty about what happened, especially seeing them negatively affected by it. The least you can do for yourself is to quit feeling sorry, guilty or embarrassed. Do not spoil them because of your mistakes but instead let them understand the whole thing that you both are not in the easy part but you can still be happy together by having each other’s hand, love and support.

  • Value and take care of yourself, too!

Even if you are the sole provider, you don’t have to forget to take care of yourself also. Give time for caring yourself by attending different kinds of physical activities that you used to do and enjoy before and most especially have some rest and get some sleep as well. You always need to bear in your mind that since it is only you that your child got, the more you have to take care of your physical health, mental and confidentiality.

4.) Never be afraid of asking help

A single mother is like a super hero, but in reality, she’s neither a super woman. There is really time that you will really feel tired, self- pity and depressed, and if that time happens, don’t be shy or feel embarrassed to ask for a help. Always remember that there are also people around you are more than willing to extend their helping hands when you need it the most. There are also organizations or different groups for single mothers having the same situations as you to talk over your pain, hindrances, problems or burdens you are having in your heart. In that way, somehow it lightens your feelings and can start over again to deal with those or any kinds of problems. Be just inspired and get more courage from the different stories from other single mother’s experiences.

Don’t you ever forget that no matter what happens, you still have your family, relatives and good friends supporting you and will help you get through all this and all that people around you aside from your child can be your strength and a good motivation to face, fight and survive for you battle as a single mother.

5.) Be Always Positive

It is normal and there is nothing wrong with the feeling of getting tired and feeling so low, but don’t ever allow that feelings to steal all the best of you. Make your child as the center core so you may keep going for their sake. Single mother’s always look for the brighter side and keep away from all the negativity because they will just drag you down.